Sam was a charming Primary Care Technician working in Memorial ER back in 2008. For practical purposes, I will refer to him as Sam. I will explain this later on as not only will it make my writing simpler, but it also has a meaning to it (S.A.M.). Sam had dark hair, a stocky build, tanned skin, and a pretty smile. I was an EMT, new to MedStar One Ambulance Service at the time. For about a month or so, he tried talking to me or making himself noticeable when we encountered one another in passing. I made it a point to not look his way because, at the time, I was trying to crawl out of a financial debt and just left a two year relationship. I was not looking for love, but love was looking for me.
Sam caught me in the hallway one day with a catchy phrase and I finally took the bait. We talked for a few minutes and he left with my phone number.
A week later, we had breakfast and he laid out the charm. He pulled up (late) in his steel blue Jeep Wrangler and bought me a cinnamon crunch bagel from The Bagel Cafe on Wilmington Island. We sat there for hours talking and he looked at me like I was an angel that just fell from heaven. I bought it. He paid attention to the breeze blowing my long dark hair as it danced on my naked shoulder.
I remember sitting across from him at this wobbly round hightop table, thinking... something is amiss here. Something about his eyes were off. Almond shaped and with a hint of danger, but I did what I normally did, and ignored my gut feeling. I pretty much did that throughout what became our entire relationship. I even ignored my gut after I ended it. Soon after he told me what his ethnicity was, I could see it in him. He had eyes of a terrorist. Boy did I hit the nail on the head with that one. Too bad I didn't listen to my gut. Something I have learned is that, "In the absence of certainty, instinct is all you can follow." Don't get me wrong, I don't think everyone with Middle-Eastern background is a terrorist... I'm just acknowledging that he is. He is an emotional terrorist and fits the profile of the bad guys to a scary degree.
I laid all of my crap onto the table, not literally speaking. I told him about all of my insecurities and dislikes, talked about all of my beliefs, etc. He seemed to be right on the same boat as me. Sneaky snake. He just wanted me to think that. One topic in particular was about abortion. Now whereas I do believe a woman should have the right to choose, I also don't believe it is a method of birth control. I think there are extenuating circumstances that could justify it, but personally couldn't do it myself.
What was I thinking? I will tell you what I was thinking. I was hurt from my past and just wanted a good guy and figured that if I laid it all out and he seemed understanding about it, then we would get along just fine. I pretty much trusted him with everything right upfront and didn't make him earn it. I was a very easy target for him. I bet he sat there and analyzed how he could play out each aspect and work me over to be his little toy that very day. I pretty much gave him everything he needed in order to know how to work me over... and he did just that. It is a lesson I eventually learned.... let other people answer questions first so you can get a better idea of what their thoughts really are vs allowing them into yours and being tricked into thinking they feel the same.
Anyway, I took the bait and agreed to another date the next night....
I came over the next night at 8pm on the dot. He answered the door in a t-shirt and really short shorts. I learned from a previous relationship that they are called "Ranger Panties." He was an ex Army Ranger. This should have been a red flag for me too because clearly any guy who wears shorts that short on a date, doesn't have a good frame of thinking. I was wearing jeans and a chocolate brown off the shoulder boucle sweater. It was freezing in his house. I sat at the table and he made dinner for me which was a bruschetta with chicken parmesan. After dinner, he invited me to the loft to watch a movie. He put in the movie "300" and played "You and me" by Lifehouse on the guitar. We started watching the movie and then he knelt before me and kissed me. One thing led to another and somehow I was in his bedroom... even after I told him three times that nothing was going to happen. We rolled around in his bed for hours, but I kept my word and we did not have sex of any kind.
We laid there, both sexually charged and exhausted and then he said he had something to tell me that might make me hate him. Well that could be anything. He told me he had just gotten a job doing contract work and got word the other day that he was going to be leaving for three months. I asked when he left and his response was, "9am tomorrow."
Ha. I was just a last minute attempt at getting a piece of ass before he left town. At least that was what I was thinking. I stayed and slept anyway and in the morning awoke to a naked Sam over me in bed. I laughed it off and asked him to put some clothes on and he did. I offered to take him to the airport and in leaving the house, he showed me where he put spare house and Jeep keys. RED FLAG. The guy has known me all of two days and is telling me where his keys are. I was a stronger me back then and I told him that I didn't want to know these things. His response was, "trust me, you need to know where this stuff is."
I dropped him to the airport and on my way home, I called my best friend. I told her every little detail, like a school girl would. I remember telling her that we likely wouldn't continue to talk and that he was going overseas and how I thought he was crazy for showing me the keys to his house and Jeep. We laughed and agreed that it was a strange night for me. I didn't even know what hit me....
I came over the next night at 8pm on the dot. He answered the door in a t-shirt and really short shorts. I learned from a previous relationship that they are called "Ranger Panties." He was an ex Army Ranger. This should have been a red flag for me too because clearly any guy who wears shorts that short on a date, doesn't have a good frame of thinking. I was wearing jeans and a chocolate brown off the shoulder boucle sweater. It was freezing in his house. I sat at the table and he made dinner for me which was a bruschetta with chicken parmesan. After dinner, he invited me to the loft to watch a movie. He put in the movie "300" and played "You and me" by Lifehouse on the guitar. We started watching the movie and then he knelt before me and kissed me. One thing led to another and somehow I was in his bedroom... even after I told him three times that nothing was going to happen. We rolled around in his bed for hours, but I kept my word and we did not have sex of any kind.
We laid there, both sexually charged and exhausted and then he said he had something to tell me that might make me hate him. Well that could be anything. He told me he had just gotten a job doing contract work and got word the other day that he was going to be leaving for three months. I asked when he left and his response was, "9am tomorrow."
Ha. I was just a last minute attempt at getting a piece of ass before he left town. At least that was what I was thinking. I stayed and slept anyway and in the morning awoke to a naked Sam over me in bed. I laughed it off and asked him to put some clothes on and he did. I offered to take him to the airport and in leaving the house, he showed me where he put spare house and Jeep keys. RED FLAG. The guy has known me all of two days and is telling me where his keys are. I was a stronger me back then and I told him that I didn't want to know these things. His response was, "trust me, you need to know where this stuff is."
I dropped him to the airport and on my way home, I called my best friend. I told her every little detail, like a school girl would. I remember telling her that we likely wouldn't continue to talk and that he was going overseas and how I thought he was crazy for showing me the keys to his house and Jeep. We laughed and agreed that it was a strange night for me. I didn't even know what hit me....
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